I met Ken some 15 years ago, at the Kootenay School of Writing, when it was sharing space with Spartacus Books in Vanocouver. I remember being struck by how canny he was about men's violence against women-- I know so few men who do their homework with such thoughtfulness and care. We became good friends and would hang out whenever he came to town. Sometimes I saw him with Rita, sometimes it was just me and him. We would talk and talk about everything under the sun, but especially about the work men had yet to do to recover from sexism, old hippie times in Vancouver (before I was around), Indigenous sovereignty and his life on the Nass River some time ago. A number of years ago, he and Rob Budde invited me to give a talk at UNBC. Together they were such gracious hosts. I remember going with him to a teach-in for Idle No More in the Rotunda. And also riding the bus with him. There were no free seats, and we were both unsteady on our feet, though for different reasons. He had just recovered from the first bout by then. I also remember having dinner with him and Rob in a lovely quiet restaurant in PG with a bank of high-backed seats. And feeling very guilty about eating meat and drinking wine while the two of them ate vegetarian food and drank water. He talked about liking to cook, and about a soup he used to make for Si, with split peas or lentils as the base, and lots of veggies added in. I'm overcome by grief. Rest in peace, my good friend. There are too few like you in this world, and your time with us was too short. I miss you.
Larissa Lai
is the author of six books including the novels Salt Fish Girl and The
Tiger Flu. Recipient of the Lambda Literary Award, the Astraea Award, and
the Tiptree Honor Book and finalist for seven more, she holds a Canada Research
Chair at the University of Calgary and directs The Insurgent Architects' House
for Creative Writing there.
