when i tell stories of my childhood
you laugh at appropriate moments
until you don't.
you don't have the right eyes for pity.
creases form above your cheekbones
& when you tense up like that
you're so much harder to kiss.
my childhood is not a sob story
in need of divine sympathy;
my life was a bomb exploding shrapnel
& the pieces live under my skin.
i don't need you
coming in with a scalpel
to remove what's fused to bone.
there is a doe-eyed sunset in her mind. what
invites her speaks in young-tongue; lifts her off the ground. it thinks in
the chains on the swing were always cold.
too cold for mittens,
too cold for skin.
the skin is hidden
in the cold.
the cold hides the skin.
her skin grows feathers.
her skin grows mouths
her skin molts.
her skin is sandpaper,
her skin is soft.
is soft and warm.
her skin is lit,
is hot to touch.
her skin burns.
her skin rots -
when she comes back from sea.
i'm tired (but) i'm so lucky
(but) i'm tired
all i can do is attend another protest speak at
another panel give another interview plan another event lunch and learn series
trivia night holding my second-hand cardboard sign made with dried out sharpie
on the back of a dominios pizza box dug out from behind my couch for the third
time this winter while my fingers freeze because if i wear gloves the chill
will slip the square out from between my fingers & drown it in white &
i’ll have to make another another another. queer youth are freezing in urbans
street after being spit out of their house like phlegm from a cold, men in
tailored suits face no consequences for the deaths they cause & we’re all
chronically living on the edge of a wind gust: hurricane-ready.
& i think maybe it's not that we want to
die it's not that we want to die it's not that we want to die-
it's just that we're so goddamned tired.
Sara Marie Nason
(they/them) is a queer, agender alumni from St. Thomas University. They are the
two-time recipient of the STU Robert Clayton Casto prize for poetry, and have
been published in a variety of periodicals, including the Feels Zine.
Along with being a semi-active poet, Sara is also an avid pun collector, and an
unabashedly angry activist.